Quite Possibly What It's All About
I told you I experienced a few truly wonderful moments in the course of my travels, and in today's post I will elaborate on two more of them. One took place at a lunchtime gathering at my cousin Luisa's house in Boscoreale. Luisa is an extraordinary cook, even by Italian standards, and this was one of those meals served in installments, each dish sufficient as a meal in itself. Several of my warm, funny, good-natured relatives were seated at the table, and I drank some red wine, enjoying each course as it appeared, and really not thinking about anything else. I appreciate a culture that allows for long lazy lunches that go on and on, and I appreciate these loving people who have always welcomed me.
There was laughter and animated conversation, even an argument between two brothers, a rising volume that peaked and dissipated. "È normale," said my aunt, with a smile and a shrug. "Lo fanno. Fratelli."
It did seem normal, and the fact that they felt no need to conceal their fighting made me feel even more like I belonged. Dessert appeared. No one was obsessing about what time it was or how fat we were getting or what would happen next. All we were doing was being here together, and I was in the moment, at the same time realizing suddenly that it was the kind of moment that might well be what everything else is about. I saw too that these people can be my family if that's what I want. I accepted the mythology. I inhabited the story. I claimed them. And I felt completely present and filled with love.
Another of the truly wonderful moments occurred with my daughter, as we sat side by side on a couch in Aljezur, Portugal. It was a non-event, really. We were just sitting there looking at pictures and gossiping and reminiscing and stalking people we once knew on Facebook and just being silly...in a sort of middle school way. We laughed ourselves giddy, laughing until we had tears in our eyes. That's all. But it had been such a long time since we laughed together like that. And you know? If that had been all that really happened the entire trip, it would have still been worth it to me.
Before I embarked upon my travels, my friend Dan had written to me, "Have a great trip, and please pay attention."
See? Sometimes I really did.